


Test Drive HD365

by Luci0logy



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Comedy, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, The Quidditch Pitch: More Than Two, Threesome
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-07-15
Updated: 2006-07-15
Packaged: 2018-10-27 14:13:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,456
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10810659
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Luci0logy/pseuds/Luci0logy
Summary: “Let me get this straight. You’re telling me that this contraption straps on to someone’s head, and whatever they fantasise about looks real, like they're really doing… whatever.”





	Test Drive HD365

**Author's Note:**

> Note from Annie, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [The Quidditch Pitch](http://fanlore.org/wiki/The_Quidditch_Pitch), which went offline in 2015 when the hosting expired, at a time I was not able to renew it. I contacted Open Doors, hoping to preserve the archive using an old backup, and began importing these works as an Open Doors-approved project in April 2017. Open Doors e-mailed all authors about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact us using the e-mail address on [The Quidditch Pitch collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/thequidditchpitch/profile).

  
Author's notes:

Beta: Saladbats. Written for the Lj community hd_365 prompt, fantasy.

The UK phrase _A cat can look at a queen_ is a way of saying I'm equal or good enough, because both cats  & queens are equal in a cat's eyes. Adam Cooper is an exceedingly talented ballet dancer and was Harry's first crush. He'd seen Adam on TV at the Dursely's.

* * *

“What’s the matter, Harry? Has something happened?”

“No, nothing's happened, everything’s fine.”

“Then why do you keep looking at me that way? You’ve been doing it all morning.”

“Are you saying you don’t like me looking at you? Can’t a cat look at a…”

“ _Don’t_ even think that word, Harry.”

“King.”

“Nice save there, Potter, and yes he can. But you’re looking at me like I’m the emperor wearing his new clothes, and you can’t quite make your mind up whether to tell me or not.”

“Actually, Draco, I have something I want to show you. I’m just not sure how you’ll react.”

“Well, that fills me with confidence. Come on then, let’s get it over with. Show me.”

“You need to be in the bedroom.”

“Really? Now that sounds more promising. After you, Harry.” 

  
* * * * * 

  
“Are you ready?”

“Yes!”

“That’s not helping, Draco.”

“Sorry. Yes, I’m ready. I’m lying here, naked, on an exceedingly comfortable bed, contemplating the perfection of your bare arse and what I’m going to do to it, if you don’t get your head out of that wardrobe this instant and show me whatever it is.”

“Ta dah!”

“A box. You wanted to show me a box?”

“No, prat. It’s what’s in the box that’s special. I just need to take the Locking Charm off first.” 

“And why, oh Gryffindor of mine, is it charmed in the first place?” 

“Because what’s inside is a prototype design.”

“A prototype design? I have the awful feeling the words Weasleys' Wizard Wheezes are going to tumble out of your mouth at any moment.”

“Ten out of ten, clever dick. It’s something Fred and George have been working on for months now. They asked me if we’d give it a test drive. And here it is, or should I say they are.”

“Omnioculars? The terrible twosome are making some new type of Omnioculars and that’s the big secret? God, Harry…”

“If you’d shut up a moment and listen, you’d learn something to your advantage.  These may look like Omnioculars, but they’re something completely different.”

“Go on. I’m intrigued – against my better judgement.”

“They’re called Pornoculars.”

“Excuse me?”

“Pornoculars. Hold this pair and pay attention. Here’s the replay, zoom and slow features you’d expect to find on ordinary Omnioculars, but these also have program, play and record too, a bit like a Muggle video recorder. You program the fantasy by touching the appropriate symbols with your wand, then use this strap to attach the Pornoculars to your head, and they pick up your um… thoughts or something like that. Fred and George lost me a bit when they explained.”

“Thoughts.”

“Not just any old thoughts. They’re supposed to show your um… fantasy as though it’s really happening while you’re thinking about… whatever.” 

“Let me get this straight. You’re telling me that this contraption straps on to someone’s head, and whatever they fantasise about looks real, like they're really doing… whatever.”

“Yes. And that’s not all. See that hand symbol there?”

“Yeah.”

“That means this model has _Feelorama_.”

“Feelor what?”

“ _Feelorama_. You activate the hand with your wand and you _feel_ your fantasy.”

“You’ve got to be kidding.” 

“That’s the theory. And these letters here let you decide how many will be taking part in the fantasy, so the Pornoculars are linked together. ‘M’ is for mono, ‘D’ for duo, ‘G’ is for a group and ‘O’…"

“Is for orgy, I’m guessing.” 

“That’s right.”

“Fuck me.”

“Well, that’s not quite what I was hoping for, but something along those lines. Draco?”

“Yeah?”

“Are you all right?”

“For once, I’m almost speechless. What’s this on the inside of the strap – HD365?” 

“That’s only the design number.” 

“Really. Then why are you blushing? I wouldn't be surprised if ‘HD’ meant Harry and Draco. And the 365… Oh, Merlin, don’t tell me they know about your New Year's resolution to shag every day?”

“I’m sorry, Draco. It sort of slipped out a while ago.”

“That explains the smirking whenever I see them. Nice one, Harry. Wait a minute, what do you mean by _something along those lines_?”

“Remember that night at Sarastro, after we saw Guys and Dolls, when you wondered what it would be like if one of us let Adam Cooper suck him off while the other one fucked him?”

“I remember. I also remember your reaction and the pounding I got off you afterwards in the toilets, not that I’m complaining.”

“Well, I was wondering if we could... you know... um..." 

"For heavens sake, Harry, spit it out."

"Trythatfantasyout."

"I beg your pardon?"

"Try that fantasy out, with these Pornoculars, I mean.”

“Harry Potter, if you get any redder you’re going to combust. So, you want a threesome with Adam Cooper?"

"Yes."

"Okay. I’m game for that, as long as that’s all it is – a fantasy.”

“Of course it is! Anyway, it was your idea, pervert.”

“True enough.” 

“You said it. Ouch!  Right then, one of us has to program and wear the master headset.”

“That’ll be you on this occasion. I’m assuming that the master headset controls the fantasy so everyone sees the same thing, more or less.”

“It’d be a bit off-putting if Adam’s head was in the sitting room and his arse was in the park, wouldn’t it?”

“I can't argue with that. So, how do we proceed with this?”

“We decide what we want in the fantasy and whether or not we’re going to use the _Feelorama_ function. Then I’ll place my wand on this brain symbol here and say _Animadverto_. When the brain begins to glow, I’ll place my wand on the play symbol and say _Lascivio_ , then we pop them on, lie back and enjoy it.”

“Unbelievable. If this works, I'm putting money into their enterprise. Can you imagine the demand for something like this?”

“Before you start fantasizing about rising stocks and shares, Draco,  we need to test this device’s ability to get a rise out of something else. So we’ll set the scene first. That’s the where, when, what and how.”

“Where? We’ll initially meet him in a club – Opium, I think, on Dean Street. When? On a Saturday night. Is that okay with you, Harry?”

“Yeah, that’s fine. Got any other ideas?”

“Plenty. What will we be doing? We’ll be engaging in a threesome after we’ve Apparated him here and had a couple of drinks.”

“And how do you see us doing that?”

"First we need to prepare Adam. So, we'll retire to the bedroom and on to our bed. I’ll suck him off and you rim him, after a Cleaning Spell of course, or the other way round. Sound good to you? Harry?”

"Mmmmm, yeah."

“Then Adam will be on his hands and knees, pure poetry in motion, as he rocks between us. You will be kneeling up, gripping his head with your fingers tangled in his hair while you fuck his mouth - slowly at first, withdrawing almost to the tip then slowly pushing back in between those moistened lips." 

"Oh, God. What an image." 

"You’ll be able to see your cock, coated with his saliva, glistening in the candle light as you move. More importantly, you'll be able to feel the pressure of his lips wrapped around you and that delicious friction on the underside of your cock as you slide over his tongue, back and forth, back and forth. Just the way you like it. ”

"You're very good at this, you know. I won’t need the Pornoculars if you keep this up."

"As for me, I’ll be gripping his hip tightly with one hand and my other hand will be stroking his erection. My thighs will be pressed against his, my cock sliding in and out of his tight arse while he writhes in pleasure before me. I'll match your rhythm and watch you come, with _that_ look on your face, mouth open and your back arched, hips driving forward as you empty yourself in his mouth. I’ll come after you, tipped over the edge by the erotic display before me and the effects of Adam's orgasm. Then we'll all collapse on the bed in a sweaty, sated heap.”

“Or, how about I fuck you now and we’ll try the Pornoculars later.”

“Ready when you are, Harry.”

“I can see that, Draco. It's staring me in the face. _Accio_ lube.”

~*~

  _Animadverto_ = see  & _Lascivio_ = play.

 


End file.
